Dear You,

There are a lot of different kinds of friends. Friends you hang out with during a class or two, friends that last a few years before you grow apart, and friends that last forever. We were the second kind, and that's okay with me. I understand that not all friendships can hold through time, and I accept that we have both changed to a point where our personalities clash.

We didn't have any one large blow out, but these tensions between us just can't continue. I can't stand there worrying about every little thing I say around you, wondering if you're going to take my words and twist them as you repeat them to others. I can't deal with the way you look at me, and I can't take knowing I have done nothing to have lost your respect in this way. We've grown apart to the point where I can easily see that you don't like me. That's perfectly okay. You've become a person that I don't like or respect either.

It's nothing personal. I just can't have toxic friends. I have goals, things to do, a thousand responsibilities. Worrying about you and your dramatic tendencies and two faced conversations with my friends is no longer a priority of mine. I have many other friends who have stood by me forever and won't turn on me at any point in the future. I have too much self respect to allow this "friendship" to continue any longer.

So let's part as acquaintances, be civil towards each other since we share many of the same friends, and let the past be the past. It's very clear that we do not need each other as friends, but we don't need each other as enemies either. Let's just set aside the hard feelings and go on with our lives. We'll both be so much better off.

Thank you for all the good memories. We've certainly had our share of laughs. If I ever figure out where things went so wrong, I'll be sure to let you know.

Making Changes

My life is pretty great. There's not a day that goes by when I don't find something to look at and just say, "Wow, I'm so lucky to have that person in my life" or "This couldn't have gone any better" or "This was just a really good day." Of course, that may largely be because I've always thought of myself as an optimist, but even though my life is very blessed and very full, there are days when I look in the mirror and still think, "How can I make things better?"

When I asked myself this a few weeks ago, it was an internal question. I was happy with my self-image, but I was a changing girl. I've grown so much in these past few years in ways that many others don't always see. That's because while these changes I've worked on may have been slight, they've made all the difference to me. They've been changes to pieces of my personality, my way of interacting with others. I'm not the shy girl I once was. I've become more than capable of speaking my mind and defending what I think is right. I've grown stronger.

That's why I discovered a slight problem. See, the girl in the mirror didn't portray that self-confidant side of me the way I wanted her to. Although she was still me, still the girl I thought of when I tried to picture myself, she didn't appear the way I truly felt she should.

I'm not so good with spontaneous decisions, but I'd been failing to set a date for myself to get my hair cut for about a month. So when my mom asked if I wanted to go to her hairdresser's with herself and my sister, I decided that now was the time. Although I was nervous, I sat down, and I closed my eyes. And when I opened them again, I had to smile. Because looking in the mirror, I saw me.

It might seem like some small little thing, but this past week I've felt so great every time I see my reflection. Because what's inside of me is shining through so much better now. And that style always looks good.